Bride slammed for ghosting friend who quit as bridesmaid after dad died

A bride who accused a close friend of ruining her wedding after she dropped out as a bridesmaid following the death of her dad has been condemned online.

Good weddings require lots of preparation. In fact, wedding planner Amy Nichols told Martha Stewart magazine that couples organizing their nuptials themselves spend anywhere between 200 to 300 hours or eight to 12 full days organizing the event.

It therefore stands to reason that any last-minute drop out is likely to be the source of some frustration for the soon-to-be-married couple, especially if it’s someone in a key role like that of bridesmaid.

However, that still doesn’t excuse the behavior of this particular Bridezilla, particularly as her bridesmaid quit a whole eight months before the big day and did so following a bereavement in her family.

Speaking in a post shared to Mumsnet, the woman who quit as bridesmaid explained that the bride was always known for having “feuds with random people for little reason” during their days together at university.

“She’d never confront the person, but would just be extremely passive aggressive around them,” she wrote.

For several years in their 20s, the pair did not speak and the bride even “ghosted” the woman and made a point of arranging social events with their friends that “excluded” her.

Though the pair reconciled, they did not keep in touch over the years following graduation. Fast forward to a few years ago, however, and the bride got in touch and invited the woman to dinner.

“It’s very unexpected. She tells me that she’s getting married and I’m going to be her bridesmaid,” she wrote. “I didn’t say anything but I really like having friends so I thought it’d be a fresh start.”

Even so, when the prospective bridesmaid tried to get in touch or arrange to meet up with her, “she’d either not reply or respond with a vague message” yet regularly met up with the rest of the wedding party.

While the bride-to-be’s radio silence was one thing then, it took on a whole other edge on the day her bridesmaid’s dad died.

“We were going to meet up on that day,” the woman explained. “I said I can’t because my dad is unwell with COVID….she didn’t respond.”

When the bride-to-be did finally text back it was a day later in the form of a message announcing she was postponing her wedding. It made no mention of her friend’s dad.

Over the next few months, the bridesmaid admits she was “struggling” with the pandemic and the loss of a parent. After hearing little in the way of planning for the big event and with other things playing on her mind, she decided to tell her she “can’t be a bridesmaid.”

She eventually replied, again a day later, telling her that “only close family and friends can come to the wedding and she is so very sorry that I can’t be there.”

Six months have now passed since the wedding but the bride has not let go. According to the Mumsnet post, the woman has been confronted by the bride’s best friend and her new husband who claimed she “ruined her wedding.”

They said she should’ve been “more grateful” to be a bridesmaid and canceled at “such short notice.” The bride is now demanding “an apology,” something her former friend is considering, given that they live near each other.

However, those commenting on the post appeared vehemently opposed to that course of action. In fact, many are calling for her to take the opposite approach and cut all ties with her.

“Forget her,” ChaToilLearn wrote. “There’s clearly something not right with her but it’s drama you don’t need and you have done nothing wrong.” Justilou1 told the woman that if anyone should be making an apology it’s the bride for “adding to the stress after your dad died.”

Throughabushbackwards commented: “I just can’t cope with this kind of drama. I’d rather have a tiny set of solid mates than spend my emotional energy coping with this. Walk away, you won’t regret it.”

Sswhinesthebest told the woman she “should have stopped the friendship at age 22,” adding “she’s not a friend and never has been. Forget about her.”

Mamaofdos urged the woman to “stay away” from the bride. “She wasn’t there for the saddest moment in your life. That speaks volumes,” she said. “I think you standing down as her bridesmaid was the right thing to do.”

Newsweek has contacted the original poster for comment.